Archive | September, 2013

An Ode To My Overdraft

19 Sep

An Ode to my Overdraft (on the day I finally paid it off)

Oh overdraft, how I have loved you so. Since your explosive arrival into my life one rainy morning in Leeds circa September 2009, we had a bond. You introduced me to a new, exciting world of opportunities, where I could do things I had never done before. I could buy things I had never bought before! We developed a compulsive relationship built on (I would like to think) mutual admiration and support. We flourished together hand in hand. You became larger and larger; I became larger and slightly better dressed.

I cannot forget the times we shared; everything you supported me through. All those frozen ready meals from Tesco in Clarence Dock. That skiing holiday in Courcheval 2010.The sheer number of Jägerbombs you bought me in Tiger Tiger Leeds. They all mean something.

The Zara sales, my round the world trip; I couldn’t have had any of it. My entire champagne lifestyle on lemonade money was because of you, overdraft, and for that I am thankful.

But I have a confession. All this time I have been plotting against you; luring you into a false sense of security with my familiar whimsical purchases and irrational overspending. But I changed, somewhere along the way. I can’t put my finger on when it was, and it is important to remember that it’s me, not you.

I have been saving. In cash, not another bank account, before you ask. All the while I have been going out to work as a waitress, to feed you, I have been earning extra from tips. And today that wad of cash in my room equated to the right amount to eradicate you, so I had to do it.

I cannot mourn your absence, for I must celebrate. Your overbearing capitalised letters ‘OD’, forever casting shadows over my financial glee, are now gone. The fiery red of your character is history, in its place is safe, calm black. Four years down the line, I think that’s what I need.

We had some good times, overdraft, but it is time to move on. It’s time to save for life, so I can afford to do all those exciting and novel things; this time on the right side of zero. But thank you. It’s been a blast.

Forever in your debt,


RIP Overdraft (2009-2013)